60 Second Relationship Boosts

Read this today and LOVED it! Great ideas for all the relationships in our lives.

It's not a secret, it's science: good relationships are a major source of happiness in our lives. As healthy adults, we have relationships with friends, parents, spouses, partners, children and ourselves, to name a few. But like anything important, all of them sometimes require work and tune-ups. If you want to quickly warm up your connection with the people closest to you, or spark a better relationship with others, these little boosts can provide BIG results, in 60-seconds or less.

Here are a few examples:

-          Partner. Think of your partner's favorite drink, snack or dessert, and stop at the store to grab it today. People love when you 'know' them, and it's truly the little things that mean a lot.

-          Friends. For a friendship that you'd like to resuscitate, send a short, thoughtful email or text. Something as simple as, "I heard 'NSYNC' on the radio today and it made me think of you. Miss you and would love to talk soon!”

-          Kids. During dinner, fill their emotional buckets with a compliment. Tell your kids something specific that you love about them or what they bring to your family. They will treasure that and remind them of that again when they're going to bed.

-          Coworkers. Buy a treat for the members of your team — could be something small like picking up a dozen donuts at the drive through on the way to work. Only takes a minute with a little pre-planning, and will make the office a sweeter place that day.

-          Yourself. Make a list of seven things that make you happy when you do them, and commit to doing at least one per day this week.

Day 22: Season Your Speech with Grace

(From www.ReviveOurHearts.com 31 Days of Encouraging Your Husband)

"Let your speech always be gracious." ~ Colossians 4:6

Do you talk positively about your husband to others...or do you complain and criticize? Here's a way to find out - ask yourself: If all my family and friends knew about my husband came from a filter of what I've said about him, what would they think of him?

Your speech should reflect 1 Corinthians 13 love. Your words should be kind and should never "rejoice in wrongdoing" (v. 6). Refrain from listing your husband's faults to others. Satan likes to trick us in this area. Be wary of sharing barbed "prayer requests." Some of what you say may come back to him - and you want your words to be sweet, building him up and never tearing him down. Don't forget, you are always criticizing-or encouraging-before an audience. God hears your conversations when you are alone with your husband in your own home. May your speech be always seasoned with grace. Focus today on how you represent your husband in your home. your church, and your community.

Action Step: Give a good word about him to others. Remember, "love covers a multitude of sins" (1 Pet. 4:8). Present your husband before others today in a strong, positive manner. Slip in a good word for your spouse. Resist the urge to correct or belittle him in front of others.

A Wife's Prayer: Lord Jesus, forgive me for being quick to slip in a jab about my husband to others. This reveals sin in my heart even as I try to reveal his. Teach me how to praise his strengths; help to cover over his sin by refusing to betray his weaknesses to others, even as I trust You to deal with him in those areas.

Is Anything Too Hard for the Lord?

"Is anything too hard for the Lord?" Genesis 18:14

This is God's loving challenge to you and me each day. He wants us to think of the deepest, highest, and worthiest desires and longings of our hearts. He wants us to think of those things that perhaps were desires for ourselves or someone dear to us, yet have gone unfulfilled for so long that we now see them as simply lost desires. And God urges us to think of even the one thing that we once saw as possible but have given up all hope of seeing fulfilled in this life.

That very thing, as long as it aligns with what we know to be His expressed will - as a son was to Abraham and Sarah - God intends to do for us. Yes, if we will let Him, God will do that very thing, even if we know if is such an utter impossibility that we would simply laugh at the absurdity of anyone ever suggesting it could come to pass.

"Is anything too hard for the Lord?" No, nothing is too diffiult when we believe in Him enough to go forward, doing His will and leting Him do the impossible for us. Even Abraham and Sarah could have blocked God's plan if they had continued to disbelieve.

The only thing "too hard for the Lord" is our deliberate and continual disbelief in His love and power, and our ultimate rejection of His plans for us. Nothing is impossible for Jehovah to do for those who trust Him. ~ Streams in the Desert

*See Mark 6:5 and Matthew 13:56

Holding On To Hope

My husband recently interviewed Nancy Guthrie for his show and I got to meet her at her Trusting God conference I attended. Her book called What Grieving People Wish You Knew: What Really Helps and What Really Hurts had such an impact on me. It's one of those books I'll need to read a few times and full of so much wisdom as only one who has walked through suffering can write. Today, I just started reading Holding On To Hope: a pathway through suffering to the heart of God by Nancy Guthrie. Her story of deep loss and the strength of her faith as she wrestled through those bleak times has me riveted. Here are some quotes that have stood out to me so far as I'm reading:

"Where some...see defeat, Nancy finds triumph." ~ Time magazine

"Nancy Guthrie - having experienced deep pain and loss herself - challenges the brokenhearted to move beyond the question "Why?" Don't let your pain be wasted, she urges. Whether you're struggling with the death of a loved one or the death of a dream, embrace your sorrow - and discover its hidden gifts."

From her chapter on worship:

"Surely our worship in the midst of pain and sorrow is particularly precious to God - because it costs us so much. Worship is not made easier, but it becomes all the more meaningful when offered from a heart that is hurting.

The truth is, worship during these times can be some of the most meaningful worship we ever experience. Perhaps we are more fully equipped to worship than ever before because we are acutely aware of our desperate need for God and our own incapacitating weakness. We have our helplessness and inadequacy in proper perspective to God's power and sufficiency.

Do you want to find the heart of God in the darkness of your suffering? In the brokenness of overwhelming grief, would you set aside your feelings of disappointment and confusion - and even anger - and begin to worship God?

When you can't find your own words, would you open to the Psalms and use the words of David in praise and confession and lament?

Would you determine to worship God's worthiness and trust in his faithfulness even when the confusion and disappointment do not immediately disappear?"

From her chapter on suffering: "...God uses painful, difficult experiences of life for our ultimate good!...Early on in my journey, I said to God, "Okay, if I have to go through this, then give me everything. Teach me everything you want to teach me through this. Don't let this incredible pain be wasted in my life!...So I can actually embrace my pain. Would you believe I can thank God for this bitter but rich experience? I can, because I know God is good - that he allows good and bad into our lives and that we can trust him with both...Rather than running from your suffering or trying to pray it away, would you embrace it and look for God in it? Would you allow suffering to be your teacher so that you can learn something from it you never could have learned from comfort and ease? "

"...In our discouragement, we can be tempted to give up on God and stop praying, wondering, What good is it anyway? Sometimes what God has allowed into our lives is so bitter that we're hurt and angry and don't even want to talk to him about it.But where does that leave us? On our own. No resources, no truth to dispel the despair, no hope. The truth is, there is no comfort to be found away from God; at least, there is no lasting, deep, satisfying comfort. Revenge, ritual, retreat - they don't bring any lasting relief from the pain. Only the truth of God's Word, the tenderness of his welcome, the touch of his healing presence bring the kind of comfort we crave. Only his promises of purpose in this life and perfection in the life to come offer us any kind of real hope to hold on to."

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-churchleaders-podcast/id988990685?mt=2&i=377418040

Holding On to Hope: A Pathway through Suffering to the Heart of God https://www.amazon.com/dp/1414312962/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_jbJiyb975KZ98

Husband Encouragement Challenge

https://www.reviveourhearts.com/articles/30-day-husband-encouragement-challenge/  (Click link for a printable PDF file)

I LOVE this 30 Days of Encouraging Your Husband Challenge by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth! Andrew and I discovered early in our dating days that we have the same love languages, which are words of affirmation and quality time. Loving him in these ways comes so naturally to me and I'm very thankful for that, but this challenge is helping me to be intentional about encouraging him in a variety of ways. Join me! :)

Community

Made this because it's my favorite quote of Mickey's that has kept coming to mind as I build community. Thankful for these encouraging words. #treasurehuntingforgrace #community #mundanefaithfulness 

"Ninety percent of the time it might not work. But keep trying. Because when it does work, it will be beautiful. Keep going until you find people who want community the way you do. It’s worth it." ~ Mickey Gauen 

Prayer Card Tutorial

When Andrew and I were engaged, I saw these prayers on Nancy Demoss Wolgemuth's Revive Our Hearts website and made my own cards with the prayers on them. It's by my jewelry stand to remind me to pray for him each day and I'm so glad I started doing this before we got married, because it's become second nature. I started making some for friends and then several of you asked if I sold them. I hadn't thought about it, but I'm considering it!

If you'd like to make your own, here's my loose version of a tutorial:

Supplies:
2 sheets of 12 x 12 colored cardstock (cut into 4 x 4 pieces, which should give you 18 total)
6 sheets of 8 1/2 x 11 white cardstock
1-2 sheets of 12 x 12 scrapbook paper
1 glue stick or double stick tape
scissors
paper cutter or scissors
a 3 x 3 photo (if using) for the front
1 loose leaf binder ring

Here's the link for the prayers - https://www.reviveourhearts.com/articles/31-days-of-praying-for-your-husband/

Make a Pages or Word document with each prayer in a 3 x 3 text box. Print onto white cardstock. Cut those and mount onto a piece of 4 x 4 colored cardstock. Punch holes in the upper left corner and slip the binder ring on. And that's it! Makes a great gift for an engaged or married friend!

Newlywed Surprises

I took a blogging hiatus in May in the midst of the flurry of wedding planning, wrapping up my busiest year of teaching, and filling my calendar with as many coffee dates, parties and girls nights as I could before I moved out of state. It was conglomeration of tears (because I'm the absolute worst at goodbyes) and long-awaited joy. It was a crazy and glorious season of letting go of life as I knew it and anticipating the new season to come.

Before I got married, so many people with sober expressions felt the need to remind me how very very hard being newly married is and I think I went into it half-expecting everything to hit the fan once we arrived back from our honeymoon. I do believe those comments were coming from a sincere well-meaning place. People offer their horror stories of how rough their early days of marriage are, because they genuiniely want you to be prepared. And some of them felt no one adequately prepared them for the tough times those early days of marriage delivered, so they've taken it on as their mission to do what they wish others would have done for them.

Another thing I know I expected was that the transition of moving from my hometown, teaching job I loved, gregarious Irish-Italian family & amazing community would be easier than it has been.

I was wrong about both assumptions.

We've only been married a little over 4 months, but it has been simply wonderful. I always knew I would love being a wife and it's better than I anticipated. So many things I worried about have just not been a big deal. Being vulnerable in every way human beings can be vulnerable with each other was something that used to give me anxiety. My life long fear has been that if someone really knew me, they wouldn't love me. Isn't that a universal fear? This being known business? Having someone truly see us - flaws and all? But my heart is home in my marriage. I can be my authentic messy complicated self and am still deeply loved. Even some of the things I was insecure about (in my looks especially) have not only been accepted, but delighted in by my husband. He has introduced me to grace and adoration I didn't think was possible. He reflects the unconditional love of Christ and I feel I have seen an even deeper glimpse of the way Jesus loves me through my sweet husband. It's exhilarating, comforting and humbling all at once.

Is marriage work? Absolutely. Yes. It's work the way anything worth pursuing is work, but it's the most delightful kind. It's exciting to grow together, to work on building our life together, and learn new ways to serve each other and love well. I even enjoy learning the art of fighting fair, but maybe that's because making up is so much fun. Sorry, not sorry.

But transitioning from my hometown and my people? Ugh. That has been surprisingly harder than I expected. I have a personal vendetta against change and an introverted personality, so I knew having this much major transition all at once was going to be challenging. But I didn't think it would be this hard. It wasn't until the comforts of my hometown, a job I felt valued and competent at, friendships that had spanned decades and my closely-knit family were taken away that I realized how much of my security and identity was wrapped up in them. It was equally humbling and frustrating. My identity is supposed to be in Christ, not those things! I know better. But I'm thankful for a very patient husband who has helped walk me through all these changes, sift through the layers of my struggles and offered a shoulder to cry on when I'm homesick for my people. And I can honestly say I'm thankful for an opportunity to lean on God and my husband in a way I wouldn't need to if I was surrounded by the comforts of my former life.

I feel like I'm on the cusp of growth in so many areas and it's exciting to think of how God is going to use this time to conform me to his image. So, instead of fighting it, I find myself leaning into the growing pains of change. My prayer has changed from asking God to take away the hard parts of this story - my ache for home, family & friends - to asking him to help me embrace all this season has to teach me. 

My Mother's Heart

"You're like my mom," a student said to me right in the middle of the Staff vs. Students basketball game, then she put her arms around my neck and laid her head on my shoulder. I felt tears welling & was reminded once again that my mother's heart has not been wasted all these years of being single. I've gotten to use my maternal gifts to love on hundreds of kids and love on my 4 sweet nephews. Thank you, God. ❤️❤️❤️

My Vintage Glam Bridal Shower!

My bridal shower hosted by my maid of honor, Sarah, was the dreamiest most elegant dinner party I've ever had in my whole life!!! I loved the twinkle lights, candles, stunning tablescape, white China dishes, elegant stemware, floral arrangements she designed, gorgeous cloth napkins she sewed herself, a delicious dinner of salmon, risotto, a garden salad with a champagne vinaigrette, French bread with Irish butter, and a decadent strawberry cake from my favorite bakery - Thyme in the Ranch in Rancho Santa Fe, a surprise romantic video made by Andrew, a fun filled game of Chick Flick Jeopardy...but BEST of all was being surrounded by sisters & dear friends who I've known since college, high school & even elementary school! The words of affirmation they shared are memories I will cherish for the rest of my life. I felt loved in every possible way and my heart could burst with JOY!!! Thank you to everyone who came and celebrated this glorious joyful season with me!  

"Hang in There vs. Wait on the Lord" by Paul David Tripp

Wednesday's Word

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Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Hang In There

Have you ever been in the middle of a difficult season and someone says to you, "Hang in there!" Maybe you've said it to a friend just recently yourself.

I think we mean well with phrases like this, and our aim is to encourage our friends or loved ones, but let's be honest: "hang in there" doesn't actually do much to lift our spirits or strengthen our resolve.

If I can be even more honest, sometimes I think we say "hang in there" because we're not prepared to minister to people who share their suffering with us. So what should we say the next time someone opens up to us?

There are many things we can say, and we need to equip ourselves to comfort those in trouble (see 2 Corinthians 1:4). But, for the sake of today's devotional, I want to examine a phrase that has given me much comfort: "I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I hope." (Psalm 130:5)

"Hang in there" and "Wait for the Lord" are similar because they both encourage us to endure difficulty. However, there's a life-changing difference between the two: "Hang in there" hopes in the individual's resolve while "Wait on the Lord" hopes in God.

Why should you tell others to wait on the Lord? Here are four reasons (and I know you can find more in Scripture):

1. Love

The Lord is not simply a loving God; no, he is the definition, the essence, and the source of love (1 John 4:8,16). We can "hang in there" when life gets hard because our destinies are held in the hands of the One who is love. Everything we experience, no matter how hard, is a result of God's love in our life

2. Wisdom

Most people look for answers to life in experiences or research or data, but for the Christian, we find our wisdom for life in a relationship. The Lord is wisdom, just like he is love. That's why Paul tells our hearts to be encouraged in Christ, "in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge." (Colossians 2:3)

3. Power

It may not seem like it during times of difficulty, but our God is a God of unchallenged rule. We're reminded of this so powerfully in Daniel 4:34-35 (print these verses out and post them in your house). We can "hang in there" when life gets hard because our stories are written by the One who is in absolute control of every element.

4. Grace

Grace, in this context, means God has given us everything we need to be what he wants us to be and to do what he calls us to do in the situation where he has placed us (2 Peter 1:3). We have a new identity and new potential, so we can face the difficulty realities of life without crumbling in fear

So, the next time a friend or loved one shares their suffering with you, don't advance the conversation with "hang in there." No, encourage them to wait on the Lord of love, wisdom, power and grace. Rather than being weakened by difficult circumstances, we can actually grow stronger as we wait!

Now that's a reason to hang in there!

God bless

Paul Tripp

---

REFLECTION QUESTIONS

1. How can you better equip yourself to be an agent of comfort for others?
2. Who is God calling you to minister to this week? Make a plan of action to speak the gospel into their troubled hearts!

My Prayer Cards

Our Wedding Prayer Party Favors

Party favor prayer cards! It says, "Our Wedding Prayer: Please join us in praying that our guests would be blessed and encouraged and, above all, that God would be glorified through our wedding day." This is what Andrew & I pray together every week. I call it our "Wedding Wednesday" tradition. Thankful that one month from today we will finally be married!!! 👰🏼💍💐🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 #lordwilling #weddingwednesday #blushpinkandgold #carolynaweddingfont 

Wedding Prayer Chain Gift Idea

I'm not sleeping these days, but this craft for a bride-to-be I work with came together on a sleepless night. An author I really respect, Nancy Leigh DeMoss, wrote 31 Days of Praying for Your Husband & I took each prayer and put it inside a paper chain link. If you tie each link with ribbon, you can reuse the chain month after month! Just a fun gift idea for my crafty friends since its wedding season! #giftideas #prayer

Prayer Quotes

"Prayer teaches you that there is a greater glory than any glory that you could ever want for yourself. Prayer is meant to help you remember that the deepest, most important motivation for every person who has ever taken a breath is the awe of God. This deep and abiding recognition of the grandeur and glory of God is meant to shape and direct everything in my life. Everything that I do and every request that I make of God is to be done in recognition that everything that exists, including me, was made for his glory ." - Paul Tripp 

From Now On

We were on an early morning walk & I was chattering away about things I needed to do. Andrew gently said, "You've been single all these years and I know you're used to taking care of yourself, but those days are over. From now on, I get to take care of you." And then I stopped right there on the sidewalk, burst into tears and buried my head in his shoulder. Overwhelmed at the way this man loves me. #worththewait Eph. 3:20-21

Paul Tripp - God's Agenda

I was just having a conversation this week about how I wondered years ago how to fall in love with a life I never wanted, trusting God's goodness when your heart gets broken, when the deepest longings of your heart go unfulfilled for so many years, etc. 

Then I read THIS today by Paul Tripp: "I am deeply persuaded that many of us struggle with questions of God's goodness, faithfulness, and love, not because he has been unfaithful to any promise in any way, but because we simply are not on his agenda page. Our agenda, our definition of what a good God should give us, is a life that is comfortable, pleasurable, and predictable; one in which there's lots of human affirmation and an absence of suffering. But consider God's agenda, as it's revealed in the following passages: James 1:2-4, 1 Pet. 1:6-7, Rom. 5:1-5, Phil. 3:7-9. 

The message is consistent throughout all of these passages. God is not working to deliver to you your personal definition of happiness. If you're on that agenda paye, you are going to be disappointed with God and you are going to wonder if he loves you. God is after something better - your holiness, that is, the final completion of his redemptive work in you. The difficulties you face are not in the way of God's plan, they do not show the failure of God's plan, and they are not signs he has turned his back on you. No, those tough moments are a sure sign of the zeal of his redemptive love." 

For further study and encouragement: 1 Peter 4:12-19

Encouraging Resources on Prayer, Waiting and Truth

Article on Prayer by my fiancé Andrew Hess: http://www.churchleaders.com/daily-buzz/277022-10-powerful-prayers-the-apostle-paul-prayed-over-gods-people.html

Matt Chandler's Interview on Marriage and Working Through Tough Times by Andrew Hess: http://www.churchleaders.com/podcast/253639-episode-1-matt-chandler-marriage-working-through-tough-seasons.html

Paul Tripp's Interview on How Awe Changes Everything by Andrew Hess: http://www.churchleaders.com/podcast/272183-paul-tripp-why-awe-changes-everything.html

Quotes on Waiting and Truth:

"You are waiting because there is a plan. You are waiting because your life is under the control of One who is wise and good. You can rest, not because you know what is happening, but because you know the One who is in control of what is happening right now." - Paul Tripp

"It is through the most difficult trials that God often brings the sweetest discoveries of Himself." ~ Streams in the Desert

"God's purposes are good and He is at work doing a thousand things that no one can see but Him. All the perplexing turns in my life lead somewhere good. God is plotting for my joy in all of the seeming setbacks of my life." - John Piper

"When we don't receive what we pray for or desire, it doesn't mean that God isn't acting on our behalf. Rather, he's weaving his story. Paul tells us to "continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving" (Colossians 4:2). Thanksgiving helps us to be grace-centered, seeing all of life as a gift. It looks at how God's blessings impact our lives. Watchfulness alerts us to the unfolding drama in the present. It looks for God's presence working as it unfolds into future grace." - A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World by Paul E. Miller

"In one way or another, every problem we have in this world is the fruit of deception - the result of believing something that simply isn't true." - Lies Women Believe by Nancy Leigh Demoss 

"...there is nothing more crucial than what we believe about God. As Hannah Whitall Smith points out in her spiritual autobiography, The Unselfishness of God, "Everything in your spiritual life depends on the sort of God you worship. Because the character of the worshiper will always be molded by the character of what he worships: If it is a cruel and revengeful God, the worshiper will be the same, but if it is a loving, tender, forgiving, unselfish God, the worshiper will be transformed slowly, wonderfully, into this likeness." 

"When prayer teams up with gratitude, when we open our eyes wide enough to see God's mercies even in the midst of our pain, and when we exercise faith and give him thanks even when we can't see those mercies, he meets us with his indescribable peace. It's a promise...Are you facing one or more chaotic, unsettled situations? Is your soul weary? There is peace, my friend, God's peace, waiting for you just beyond the doors of deliberate gratitude." - Choose Gratitude by Nancy Leigh DeMoss

"We must not suffer Satan to shake our confidence in the God of truth by pointing to our unanswered prayers. Unanswered petitions are not unheard. God keeps a file for our prayers - they are treasured in the King's archives. This is a registry in the court of heaven wherein every prayer is recorded. Tried believer, thy Lord hath a tear-bottle in which the costly drops of sacred grief are put away, and a book in which thy holy groan ins are numbered. By and by, thy suit shall prevail. Canst thous not be content to wait a little? Will not thy Lord's time be better than thy time? By and by he will appear, to thy soul's joy, and make thee put away the sackcloth and ashes of long waiting, and put on the scarlet and fine linen of full fruition." - Spurgeon

Books:

One of my all time favorites!! - Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free by Nancy Leigh DeMoss

http://www.amazon.com/Lies-Women-Believe-Truth-that/dp/0802472966?ie=UTF8&keywords=lies%20women%20believe%20and%20the%20truth%20that%20sets%20them%20free&qid=1460994496&ref_=sr_1_1&sr=8-1 

Always True: God's Promises When Life is Hard by James Macdonald 

http://www.amazon.com/Always-True-Gods-Promises-When/dp/0802458696/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1460994582&sr=1-1&keywords=always+true+james+macdonald

PP&T Retreat 2016!

Can't WAIT for this weekend's retreat getaway with my 7 closest friends from college!!! We met our freshman year -  17 years ago & I love that we still do our yearly sleepover / retreat to catch up on all God is going in our lives & pray together. Priceless friendships. 

"...in those moments I realized why this kind of time together matters so much: because there are things you can't know, and questions you can't ask, and memories you can't recover via email and voicemail. It was about being there, about being there to really see what's exactly the same and what's totally different about each one of us...because we had the time, because we could let conversations wind and unwind, because we could start them at dawn and pick them up again in the afternoon and add a few more thoughts in the evening, we circled down to the places you never get to when you just see one another at weddings, giving out funny sound bytes over bites of cake....if you're lucky enough to have your {heart to heart friends} all right in your very own town, I hope you soak it up, and that you lie around in each other's backyards every Saturday afternoon or stay up late on one another's porches three nights a week. But if you're like me, and if those faces are far away, get a weekend on the calendar and get there. Share your life with the people you love, even if it means saving up for a ticket and going without a few things for a while to make it work. There are enough long lonely days of the same old thing, and if you let enough years pass, and if you let the routine steamroll your life, you'll wake up one day, isolated and weary, and wonder what happened to all those old friends....so walk across the street, or drive across town, or fly across the country, but don't let really intimate loving friendships become the last item on a long to-do list. Good friendships are like breakfast. You honk you're too busy to eat breakfast, but then you find yourself exhausted and cranky halfway through the day, and discover that your attempt to save time totally backfired. In the same way, you can try to go it alone because you don't have time or because your house is too messy to have people over, or because making new friends is like the very worst parts of dating. But halfway through a hard day or a hard week, you'll realize in a flash that you're breathtakingly lonely, and that the Christmas cards aren't much company. Get up, make a phone call, buy a cheap ticket, open your front door. Because there really is nothing like good friends, like the sounds of their laughter and the tones of their voices and the things they teach us in the quietest, smallest moments." - from Bittersweet p. 62 by S. Niequist 

Engagement, Anticipation & Contentment

"Contentment is the equilibrium between the enjoyment of life now and the anticipation of what is to come. Contentment serves as a guard against desires gone wild. It is the key to unlock you from the bondage of unrestrained longing that wells up within your heart and inevitably begins to control your life, making you a slave to what you don't have instead of a fully engaged participation with what you do. It is the faith-filled belief that what God has bestowed now is worthy of gratitude and appreciation, not merely because it is enough but because it is good." Priscilla Shirer (Thank you, Jamesy, for sharing this!)

New Morning Mercies: Need

From 3-17 reading - "...when you tell yourself that something is a need, 3 things follow. First, you feel entitled to the thing, because, after all, it is a need. Second, because it is a need, you feel it's your right to demand it. And third, you then judge the love of another person by his or her willingness to deliver the thing. This not only happens in our relationships with one another, but more important, it happens in our relationship with God. When you name something as a need and God doesn't deliver it; you begin to doubt his goodness. What is deadly about this is that you simply don't run for help to someone whose character you've come to doubt. 

In Matthew 6:32, Jesus reminds us that we have a Heavenly Father who knows exactly what we need...the comfort is that, by grace, we have been made to be the children of the wisest, most loving Father that the universe has ever known. We can rest in the grace that has made us his children, knowing that our place in his family guarantees that we will have what we need." - Paul Tripp, New Morning Mercies 

Brave

Morning Reflections. #journaling #savoringthejourney

Wedding Wednesday!

Today, Andrew & I started a tradition I call "Wedding Wednesday", where we set aside time to pray together specifically for our guests (that each one would be blessed and encouraged) and for Jesus to be glorified in our wedding. 

I heard the phrase "Wedding Wednesday" years ago & the bride and her friends would get together to watch chick flicks & work on wedding plans. I loved the name, but wanted to make the tradition my own & prayer has been my anchor as a single. It continues to be my anchor as an engaged woman. And I keep thinking about my guests - each of them at a different season of life & I remember how going to God-honoring gospel centered weddings renewed my hope as a single & my fervor to pray faithfully for God's best in my love story. I went to one wedding in particular at 15 years old that challenged me deeply - what I thought about love, honoring the Lord, loving selflessly, and walking in purity. I'm praying the same for my younger guests - that they would be encouraged to wait on the Lord. That waiting IS possible by His grace and SO worth it! May He be glorified in our story & may each guest be truly uplifted in whatever season they are in. 

Ps.119 Prayer for My Husband

Hopefully, this is somewhat coherent as I haven't had my coffee quite yet. I'm often up at the crack of dawn these days & too excited to sleep since the wedding is 116 days away!! 

I've been thinking about this after a few conversations I've had recently with friends on prayer & singleness. I started this blog in 2011, I believe, when I didn't know what to do with my longing for marriage. Then I came across something that resonated with me, which said instead of denying your longings, use them as a springboard to fuel your prayer life. It felt bold and a little scary to admit out loud that I wanted to be married. And sometimes when I would muster up the courage to give voice to those feelings, a married woman would remind me how difficult marriage was and I should be thankful I get to "be selfish and do whatever I wanted." My jaw dropped hearing those words. And I felt guilty admitting there was something else I deeply wanted when I did enjoy my life, a great job, rich friendships & community, a family I would choose as friends, etc. It seemed selfish to ask God for more when I knew I had so much to be thankful for, but everything in me felt wired to be a wife. That's when I decided to start my Wives Praying Boldly blog as a way to consistently bring my desire for marriage before the Lord and unite both single and married women who desired to support their marriages or future marriages with the foundation of prayer. It gave me a space to share my heart, to be honest about the struggles of being single longer than I had hoped and to keep praying for the husband I believed God had for me. 

"When the day comes that your love story is celebrated by your closest friends and family, you'll know that every prayer was worth it. Every whispered word from a tender heart is precious to God. No request is ignored. No moment spent with your Heavenly Father is wasted. 

You might even wish you had prayed more. Why? Because your prayers are the first gifts you will give to your future husband. Gifts in which heaven participates. Gifts send ahead before the two of you have even met." ~ Praying for Your Future Husband: Preparing Your Heart for His by Robin Jones Gunn and Tricia Goyer.

Andrew and I are praying for each other based on verses from Psalm 119. 

Today's prayer is that "the Lord will do good to Andrew according to His Word." (Psalm 119:65)

Join me in prayer for your husband or future husband!

Envy by Paul Tripp

"Envy denies grace. The assumption of envy is that we deserve what another has been given, when, in fact, you and I deserve nothing. Envy is self-focused and self-righteous. It inserts you into the center of your world. It makes it all about you. It tells you that you deserve what you don't deserve. Envy is expectant and demanding. Envy tells you that you are someone you aren't and you are entitled to what is not rightfully yours. Envy cannot celebrate the blessing of another because it tells you that you are more deserving. Envy forgets who you are, forgets who God is, and is confused about what life is all about. Yet, having said all of that, the fact is that all of us struggle with envy somehow, some way, and at some time. Envy is universal because sin is. Envy is self-focused; because it is self-focused, it's entitled; because it's entitled, it's demanding; because it's demanding, it tends to judge the goodness of God by whether he has delivered what you feel entitled to; and because it judges God I that basis, it leads you to question his goodness. Because you question God's goodness, you won't run to him for help. Envy is a spiritual disaster. Grace reminds you that you deserve nothing, but it does not stop there - it confronts you with the truth that God is gloriously loving, gracious, and kind, that he lavishes on us things we could never have earned. Grace also reminds us that God is wise and he never gets a wrong address - he gives each of us exactly what he knows we need. For further study and encouragement: James 3:13-18 (New Morning Mercies: a Daily Gospel Devotional by Paul Tripp)

A Tribute To Carolyn

I was blessed to attend a celebration of life on Saturday for Carolyn, the mother of two of my students. The next day as I was processing the impact she had in me, I wrote a poem about her. Yesterday morning she went to be with Jesus. Please pray for her husband and children. 

Girl Meets Change

Reading a new book on the topic of change to help prepare my mind & heart for all the coming transitions marriage will bring. 156 more days!!! :) This quote from the book caught my eye & I had to share:

On Ch 5: Accepting Limitations of Girl Meets Change by Kristen Strong. Love this quote by one of her friends struggling with unmet longings: "...some days are hard. Really hard. I want something so much, yet I know very well God may not give it to me...{yet} there is a peace that comes with knowing his will for us will be what's best for us, regardless of the outcomes." "Her voice trembled, but there was a quiet strength in it, too. It held both truth that she felt her struggle and it felt assured of God's provision, even if the provision looked different from what she wished. The very struggle that could have made her question God propelled her faith forward...she thrived in spite of her circumstances. Does it mean she didn't have her own times of tears and wishing things were different? No. But it does mean she knew how to wallow in God's truth more than her tears. The way she bravely spoke through her heartache showed me what it looked like to live knowing God's promises were totally & completely true."