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I know what you might be thinking ~ "Jen, you have a long way to go! You're not even married yet!"
True.
But God can do anything! And though my goal is to live my season of singleness to its fullest and enjoy it, I think it's important to acknowledge my longing for marriage and motherhood & let it serve as fuel for earnest prayer.
There's definitely a balance.
Anyway, for the most part, my desire to be a mom is happily satisfied by being a teacher to many many kids and auntie to two sweet boys. There's nothing like being needed by little people! It's completely wonderful.
But lately, I've felt the gentle stirrings of maternal love. . .loving on kids I don't have yet (is that strange to love your future kids??), but hope to someday. Whether they are adopted or my own, I just have this need to be a mom! And (not to sound conceited) I think I'd be great at it!
I've always been one of those counter-culture old fashioned types that wanted to be a wife and mom from a young age. I think it's because my own mom made it look so good! She got married young and has always loved kids. There are 5 girls in our family, but she always says, she could have easily had 10! No, she's not exaggerating, either. She came from a family of 7 kids and her cousins family had 16 kids, so she's always loved big families. All she ever wanted to be was a wife and a mom & considered it her ministry & greatest achievement. How amazing is that??
So, I'm trusting that the God who gave me this desire in a world where more and more women are choosing careers over family or personal fulfillment over pouring themselves out daily for little ones, will fulfill it in the way He sees best. I believe He gave me this mother's heart for a reason and that it will be used for my good & His glory!
This was in Streams in the Desert:
Hab. 2:3, "For the vision is yet for an appointed time. . .though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come."
It takes a long time for some pensioners to learn that delays are not denials. Ah, there are secrets of love and wisdom in the "Delayed Blessings Department," which are little dreamt of! Men would pluck their mercies green when the Lord would have them ripe. "Therefore will the Lord WAIT, that He may be gracious unto you" (Isa. 30:18). Do not grieve Him by doubting His love. Nay, lift up your head, and begin to praise Him even now for the deliverance which is on the way to you, and you will be abundantly rewarded for the delay which has tried your faith.
